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sometimes, NO sounds like “umm”.
sometimes NO is the holding of a breath.
sometimes NO is screamed through a facial expression rather than a verbal negative.
sometimes NO is in the dead stare of someone’s eyes.
sometimes NO is in the back of our throat when we answer…Sadly a lot of people feel pressured by their sexual partners to say yes, so yes honestly does NOT mean yes unless it is a continuous, enthusiastic, consenting, yes. You should always pay attention to your partner’s body language and expression, and make is very clear that their consent is the most important thing in your intimate relationship with them so you know that yes means yes. Some partners don’t give their lovers that option and pressure them into a yes.
Yes does not always mean yes.
Yeah, that is sad. But Yes should always mean Yes.
Think of it as signing a legal contract, if you didn’t want to sign it then why would you sign it? If someone is feeling pressured to say “Yes” then that’s a red flag for them to say “No”
And we shouldn’t be saying “Learn when someone is being pressured into doing something they don’t want”, we should be saying “Learn to tell people when they’re pressuring you into doing something you don’t want” If someone pressures me into doing something I don’t want to do but I do it anyways, then it’s my fault for doing it and I should live up to the consequences (whatever they may be). Blaming others for your own mistakes is childish.
See, I just can’t get behind that mindset.
People are pressured into abusive relationships with that mindset and then told its their fault for staying, which I just find abhorable at best. :/
The blame should never fall on the victim, even if they didn’t have the courage to back out.
Plus I’m going to ask that we end the discussion here, simply because this sort of thing is really triggering for me to talk about. I was a victim of sexual harassment and verbal abuse, and it’s taken a long time to realize it’s not my fault for not saying no, because I was too threatened and afraid to stand against my abuser.
So… yeah. Sorry things got heavy, but I’m going to have to cut the conversation short.
