Real Talk: I just drank 16 ounces of milk in the span of thirty seconds because I had a burning acid feeling in my throat and was tearing up the stinging. Being the majestic and smart creature I am, I sprinted into the kitchen with no warning to my parents and filled up our largest glass to the brim with the cold base that is milk. I sensually guzzled that soothing beverage whilst looking around the room blindly since I had no glasses on. The low ph level caressed my aching throat, and now all is well.

Except my stomach is now appalled at me for drinking that much milk in less than a minute. Sorry, tum tum.