Theory: @pukicho and @i-am-a-fish are the same Eldritch Entity™.

2018 is such a wild time to be alive. I have no idea what to expect anymore. Transgender rights being threatened? E. Coli outbreaks because the president didn’t think monitoring the water conditions of crops was important? Sky’s the limit when we’re all gonna die anyways. :)

Fun Fact: My roommate owns a haunted painting named Lucille.

Fun Fact: Every month, we determine a “housemate of the month”.

Fun Fact: December’s housemate of the month will be Lucille.

Have y’all ever learned something about your parents that you wish you hadn’t?

Hot Take: All Might is a disabled person in his regular form, given that his body has been irreparably ravaged by the injuries from All For One as well as the corrective surgeries following the incident, limiting his physical capabilities in a very real way despite being able to function in a relatively normal way.

Additional Hot Take: Not all disabilities function the same, and some disabled people can still accomplish great feats of physical strength.

A Day In The Life Of An OCD Patient

((It’s a long post, but I feel it’s worth reading. Also, I welcome and encourage other people with OCD to share their experiences as well.))

Obsessive-compulsive disorder is a widely known yet grossly misunderstood mental illness. The media would lead one to believe in the stereotypical representation of obsessive-compulsive disorder. If asked to describe the illness, the average person would likely give the following persona: a high-strung “neat freak” with an obsession over cleanliness and order. Some people with OCD may experience this, but they are not the majority. In actuality, there are two primary diagnostic criteria: the experience of obsessions and/or compulsions, and the amount of time spent on these obsessions and compulsions throughout the day. Obsessions are recurring and intrusive thoughts that cause distress to the patient. Compulsions are behaviors that the patient carries out in order to alleviate the stress caused by obsessions. These behaviors can manifest in countless ways. To illustrate, I will describe my own experience as an example of how OCD can present itself and how it disrupts daily life.

When I wake up and get ready for the day, my first obstacle tends to be brushing my teeth. I have always hated this task, and would often avoid it. When I brush my teeth, I always clean my tongue, or else I’ll have bad breath. When I clean my tongue, I have to be thorough or there’s no point- this results in me trying to scrub the very back of my tongue and triggering a gag reflex. Impulsively, I do this three or four times in a row, until my body is content, and then I finish up and move on. As I leave for class, I lock the door and check the doorknob. And then I check it again. And again. One more time for good measure? Okay, now I can go. I take a few steps forward, then pause. Did I remember to lock the door? I go back and check a couple more times. Finally, I’m on my way to class. Walking to class, I keep my eyes on the ground to be sure I don’t step on the lines in the pavement. I don’t know what would happen if I do- nothing, probably- but I’m worried nonetheless and do what I need to in order to alleviate the discomfort.

Classrooms are minefields. I don’t know what will be awaiting me, and what could set me off at any moment. Sitting down, I notice that the person next to me has their bag open and hanging over the edge of the table. My heart rate quickens and feel afraid. If that bag doesn’t move, it will surely fall off the edge of the table. I try to look forward and ignore it. There’s some writing on the board that hasn’t been fully erased. Haphazardly strewn fragments of marker taunt me, and I decide to just stare down at my notebook, trying not to think about the bag and the board. And then, of course, someone coughs. I tense up, wincing as I brace myself. They clear their throat loudly, then sniffle. They likely have a cold, making them a soundboard from my worst nightmares. It continues for a few minutes, and my body is shivering. Violent thoughts flood my mind, and they terrify me as I try to block everything out. I want to commit acts of great violence against the source of these noises. I’m upset, and on the verge of tears, so I get up and leave abruptly. Once outside of the classroom, I begin to calm a bit and wait around for my next class. On a bad day, this may happen during every class. During my next class, I keep trying to write a paragraph, but my handwriting doesn’t look how I want it to. I rip the barely marked page and crumple it up, having to start over until I am contented.

After all of my classes, I drive home. After parking, I lock my car and see the lights flash. I remove my headphones and lock it again so I can hear it lock. Then, I reach for the door handle and check as many times as I need to know it’s locked. I head back to my apartment and see the living room is still cluttered. I don’t bother to clean it, but I do putter around until nothing is unappealing to my eyes. Nothing over the edge of the tables, no misaligned papers, and so on. It’s about time to glue my dentures in again, as the sealant wore off. This means I have to go through the struggle of brushing my teeth all over again.

I make dinner, and suddenly I can’t remember if I locked my car or not. It gnaws at me, even though I’m pretty sure I locked it. But what if I didn’t? So I put on my coat and shoes, and I walk out to where my car is parked, a five minute walk from the apartment. I go and find that it was indeed locked, and then go through my cycle of checking before I go back inside. Dinner is ready, and I dish up my plate with absolute precision. No different foods may touch. At all. If the juices from a piece of pork dribble into my mashed potatoes, then I will dispose of the contaminated portion, wipe up the juices, and continue eating with an untainted meal. I take a sip of soda, then press my tongue to the sharp edge of the opening of the can. I don’t know why I do, but if I don’t then I become uncomfortable and nervous until I do. Some of these compulsions don’t make any sense, but here I am nonetheless. Throughout the evening, I notice various things to adjust and get up every time to fix it. I think about something that might be unsightly in another room. Is my plate hanging over the edge of my nightstand? I go and check. No, I didn’t. But I still had to check, of course. Every time I feel uncomfortable or nervous, I crack my knuckles. It doesn’t alleviate anything, it just feels nice. I used to bite my nails, but with dentures I can’t do that, so I make sure to trim them almost daily so they remain short. They’re kind of painfully short- I can’t open pull tabs very well. I keep them this way, though. That’s just how it is.

It’s time for bed, and as usual, I can’t get comfortable until I crack my back, crack my neck, crack my knuckles, stretch, lay on both sides, crack my knuckles again, crack my back again, and then lay down… and do it all again in a few minutes until I eventually pass out.

That’s my average day, every day. It used to be worse, but medication certainly helps a lot. I wish that more people know about this side of OCD; I’m fairly open about it with others because I want to dispel the myths and stereotypes. Even if it’s sometimes difficult to talk about, they are necessary conversations that will help us, as a society, strive towards the better treatment of mentally ill people.

I am too lazy to make this, so I’m pitching my idea into the void in hopes that someone will fulfill it.

When your friend shows you a meme…
[image of Yugi Moto revealing his trap card, which is a shit ton of memes, captioned “You just activated my trap card.”]

Becoming an adult is calling anime characters “my son” or “my precious child” instead of having crushes on them. 

I just finished Deltarune Chapter 1 and I have a lot of feelings about it. I will say that Undertale hit me more emotionally and told a better story, but that’s also me trying to compare a single chapter of one game to the entirety of another.

Playing it blind was an absolute treat and it felt great to delve back into another Toby Fox adventure. If you haven’t played it, I 100% recommend it. You can technically play it without having played Undertale, but you’re doing yourself a great disservice if you don’t complete Undertale first. They take place in alternate universes, but you will miss a LOT if you don’t have the context for the references.

I’m impressed that after a game like Undertale, Toby Fox still surprised me with this game and all it changes from the Undertale format while retaining the charm of its predecessor. It will probably be a long wait for the chapter, but I’m already excited to see how the story continues.

I had a dream last night where my mom was smoking pot and I was like “oh wow I didn’t know you smoke” and she looked me in the eyes and said “there’s a lot you don’t know about me” and then I woke up sweating.

Fun Fact: If I shout loud enough, I can get my roommate’s Alexa to play Despacito.