A Day In The Life Of An OCD Patient

((It’s a long post, but I feel it’s worth reading. Also, I welcome and encourage other people with OCD to share their experiences as well.))

Obsessive-compulsive disorder is a widely known yet grossly misunderstood mental illness. The media would lead one to believe in the stereotypical representation of obsessive-compulsive disorder. If asked to describe the illness, the average person would likely give the following persona: a high-strung “neat freak” with an obsession over cleanliness and order. Some people with OCD may experience this, but they are not the majority. In actuality, there are two primary diagnostic criteria: the experience of obsessions and/or compulsions, and the amount of time spent on these obsessions and compulsions throughout the day. Obsessions are recurring and intrusive thoughts that cause distress to the patient. Compulsions are behaviors that the patient carries out in order to alleviate the stress caused by obsessions. These behaviors can manifest in countless ways. To illustrate, I will describe my own experience as an example of how OCD can present itself and how it disrupts daily life.

When I wake up and get ready for the day, my first obstacle tends to be brushing my teeth. I have always hated this task, and would often avoid it. When I brush my teeth, I always clean my tongue, or else I’ll have bad breath. When I clean my tongue, I have to be thorough or there’s no point- this results in me trying to scrub the very back of my tongue and triggering a gag reflex. Impulsively, I do this three or four times in a row, until my body is content, and then I finish up and move on. As I leave for class, I lock the door and check the doorknob. And then I check it again. And again. One more time for good measure? Okay, now I can go. I take a few steps forward, then pause. Did I remember to lock the door? I go back and check a couple more times. Finally, I’m on my way to class. Walking to class, I keep my eyes on the ground to be sure I don’t step on the lines in the pavement. I don’t know what would happen if I do- nothing, probably- but I’m worried nonetheless and do what I need to in order to alleviate the discomfort.

Classrooms are minefields. I don’t know what will be awaiting me, and what could set me off at any moment. Sitting down, I notice that the person next to me has their bag open and hanging over the edge of the table. My heart rate quickens and feel afraid. If that bag doesn’t move, it will surely fall off the edge of the table. I try to look forward and ignore it. There’s some writing on the board that hasn’t been fully erased. Haphazardly strewn fragments of marker taunt me, and I decide to just stare down at my notebook, trying not to think about the bag and the board. And then, of course, someone coughs. I tense up, wincing as I brace myself. They clear their throat loudly, then sniffle. They likely have a cold, making them a soundboard from my worst nightmares. It continues for a few minutes, and my body is shivering. Violent thoughts flood my mind, and they terrify me as I try to block everything out. I want to commit acts of great violence against the source of these noises. I’m upset, and on the verge of tears, so I get up and leave abruptly. Once outside of the classroom, I begin to calm a bit and wait around for my next class. On a bad day, this may happen during every class. During my next class, I keep trying to write a paragraph, but my handwriting doesn’t look how I want it to. I rip the barely marked page and crumple it up, having to start over until I am contented.

After all of my classes, I drive home. After parking, I lock my car and see the lights flash. I remove my headphones and lock it again so I can hear it lock. Then, I reach for the door handle and check as many times as I need to know it’s locked. I head back to my apartment and see the living room is still cluttered. I don’t bother to clean it, but I do putter around until nothing is unappealing to my eyes. Nothing over the edge of the tables, no misaligned papers, and so on. It’s about time to glue my dentures in again, as the sealant wore off. This means I have to go through the struggle of brushing my teeth all over again.

I make dinner, and suddenly I can’t remember if I locked my car or not. It gnaws at me, even though I’m pretty sure I locked it. But what if I didn’t? So I put on my coat and shoes, and I walk out to where my car is parked, a five minute walk from the apartment. I go and find that it was indeed locked, and then go through my cycle of checking before I go back inside. Dinner is ready, and I dish up my plate with absolute precision. No different foods may touch. At all. If the juices from a piece of pork dribble into my mashed potatoes, then I will dispose of the contaminated portion, wipe up the juices, and continue eating with an untainted meal. I take a sip of soda, then press my tongue to the sharp edge of the opening of the can. I don’t know why I do, but if I don’t then I become uncomfortable and nervous until I do. Some of these compulsions don’t make any sense, but here I am nonetheless. Throughout the evening, I notice various things to adjust and get up every time to fix it. I think about something that might be unsightly in another room. Is my plate hanging over the edge of my nightstand? I go and check. No, I didn’t. But I still had to check, of course. Every time I feel uncomfortable or nervous, I crack my knuckles. It doesn’t alleviate anything, it just feels nice. I used to bite my nails, but with dentures I can’t do that, so I make sure to trim them almost daily so they remain short. They’re kind of painfully short- I can’t open pull tabs very well. I keep them this way, though. That’s just how it is.

It’s time for bed, and as usual, I can’t get comfortable until I crack my back, crack my neck, crack my knuckles, stretch, lay on both sides, crack my knuckles again, crack my back again, and then lay down… and do it all again in a few minutes until I eventually pass out.

That’s my average day, every day. It used to be worse, but medication certainly helps a lot. I wish that more people know about this side of OCD; I’m fairly open about it with others because I want to dispel the myths and stereotypes. Even if it’s sometimes difficult to talk about, they are necessary conversations that will help us, as a society, strive towards the better treatment of mentally ill people.

Education Grumps

This is gonna be long, but I implore you to bear with me.

Today’s episode Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door was fantastic!

…except for a passive joke Arin made towards the end. You can say I’m being overly sensitive, but at least hear me out before you do so.

NOTE: I fucking love the Grumps and have been watching them for years. I’m not trying to draw hate to them or anything of the sort. I just wanted to take this scenario to raise awareness, because I believe this came from a place of ignorance and not an intent to harm.

In today’s episode (July 2nd, 2017), Admiral Bobbery joined the party for reals this time. For those who watched the episode or have played the game, you’d know that Bobbery is convinced he’s going to die, and thus closes his eyes so he drift off to the afterlife. Except… he’s not dead. He’s asleep. Take note that he closed his eyes of his own volition, purposefully laying back to “die” (fall asleep in actuality).

“Cut to the chase- what was so offensive?” said the Straw Man™ across the room.

Before I put it to words, I’ll first put the quote here as well as its context:

[A Sleepy Sheepy item was used on Mario and Bobbery, though only Mario was affected. Thus, Mario fell asleep while Bobbery remains awake.]

“Bobbery the sleeping fucking narcoleptic bomb doesn’t fall asleep?”

Okay, let me do some explaining. For starters, “narcoleptic” is not a casual adjective. It should never be used to describe someone unless you are talking about someone who does have narcolepsy. The reason is simple: narcolepsy is a serious illness. Throwing around the term as if it’s nothing trivializes a condition that will affect 1 in 3,000 people for their whole life. There is no cure.

As you may have surmised by now, I am someone who has to live with narcolepsy. It’s something that affects me every day, some days moderately and some days extremely.

Someone proposed a possible explanation to the effect of: “Well, Bobbery abruptly fell asleep earlier so maybe they actually think he has narcolepsy.”

That is a good thing to consider, but I earlier explained how he fell asleep of his own volition, not against his will. Not only that, but he was (more or less) easily roused from his sleep. Furthermore, people with narcolepsy cannot be forcefully woken up from a sleep attack; they have to just wait it out until they wake up. That aside, I do not think Arin actually thought Bobbery had narcolepsy. He has made a handful of passing jokes about someone being narcoleptic in past Game Grumps episodes.

The media either never talks about/shows narcolepsy, or when they do show it they show it as a trite stereotype. If that’s all people see, of course they won’t know that it’s not a joking matter? I won’t preach for too long, but I’d like to describe a bit of what narcolepsy is really like.

Narcolepsy manifests differently with each person, so I’m describing what is typically the most common experience. That being said, let’s talk about sleep attacks. You don’t slowly lull into a sleep attack. With absolutely no warning, at any time or place, it occurs out of nowhere. Every time, there’s the risk of being unlucky and causing trauma to the head (I am fortunate for this to not have happened). My body is consistently spotted with bruises from the falls caused by sleep attacks. When it happens in public, it’s mortifying. I become a public spectacle if someone I know isn’t with me to stop them from gawking. For me, these episodes last up to 20 minutes. Some of the worst places I’ve had sleep attacks are the middle of the mall, the grocery store, the middle of class, the hallway… you get the idea.

And that’s just a fraction of what narcolepsy really is. I figured this illustrated my point enough, and the reason that it upsets me so much when people throw around the term as if it’s a synonym for “sleepy”.

Once more: this is not meant to be vindictive or judgemental. Instead, I wanted to use this opportunity to make this post because I’m pretty certain just about everyone reading this also wasn’t aware of why it’s a big deal.

If you’re a Grumps fan and wanna pass some knowledge on, feel free to reblog. I encourage it!

reblog by only using one word to describe what country/state you’re from

chakkmon:

senpai-just:

doubledealer93:

kaijutegu:

fists-of-platinum:

gojira-senpai:

princeoftheironfist:

atomictiki:

reisartjunk:

leceiju:

mrf3ztheguy:

kirby-universe:

caffrinluvsut:

thatone-redguy:

treehousecomix:

sunnypone:

beetlesnout:

bramblewing:

jays—wing:

rosethorn-rapier:

thxwxrld:

sourcoated:

rosejiannahasnolife:

king-zigzag:

raphadelialovesyou:

cryingoveraphsweden:

the-albino-devil:

nyausgris:

icantcommunicate:

thenameboredomeswastaken:

dororo-and-kululu:

sunmooneclipsewitch:

ponponponpanda:

twinklecupcake:

tifablog:

tamas-asks:

popandcub:

goldlovesthedecapoda:

anonymun-jay:

dirgeofthedeep:

baconlyswiss:

nella26:

boo-bear9396:

shinyzango:

squigglydigglydoo:

gotabonetapick:

ya-boi-boi:

jurassic-queen:

darth-baeder:

galactic-cactus123:

must-be-mythtaken:

copperplanets:

cisphobiccommunistopinions:

lillylouwho:

coolpepcat:

nbgirlsidon:

shinyrods:

bbysnks:

kawaii-shitface:

fuckrumblr:

aliens-on-neptune:

mr-universe99:

Gumbo

Hot

Yeehaw

Dunkins

gators

gambling

animals

cheese

hell

tobacco

in n out

salmon

Tea

Alligator

corn

Dracula

Actors

Mosquitoes

Pizza.

Hippie

Yall

Fry sauce

Oranges

Uff-da

Lakes

Celebrities

Crap

Tacos

Rain.

Construction

Semis

Hicktown

Tea

North

Hell

The Boonies.

Cactus

Muddin’

moist

Drought

leprachaun

Maple

Mountains

Disney

Rushmore

vroomvroom

Hot

Yeehaw

jumbalaya

shore

crab

Ç̗͇̘̘͓̬͉O̴̝͚̗̬̼ͅŖ̭̮N̞̩̣̤̬̥͇͟

gun

chicken

hockey

pizza

mitten

corn

corruption

What

hard

Waffle house

Starbucks

(Source: spoopiedoopie)

What Adderall ACTUALLY Does

Posting this because misinformation about Adderall can make people more likely to misuse it or not take it when they need it ((plus it raises the stigma of ‘tweaky kids’ on Ritalin and Adderall’)).

Disclaimer: Adderall will affect everyone uniquely, though there are predominant effects that can generally be expected. I will be describing my experience, as it seems to be along the lines of the general expectations of what it should do.

Okay, so I took Adderall for almost a year- now I take Vyvanse, which is a long-acting Adderall ((more on that later, folks)). I take it for narcolepsy and ADHD symptoms, as narcolepsy causes excessive daytime sleepiness and I need it to be awake and function like a person.

What the fuck is Adderall? Well, it’s a stimulant drug ((yes, it’s in the same family as meth but no, it’s not like meth)) that increases the productivity of the dopamine ((the hormone that makes you happy and satisfied and is linked to depression and other mental disorders)) and norepinephrine ((the hormone that makes you stressed and is linked to schizo-type disorders)) in order to treat ADHD and narcolepsy ((among other things)).

It starts at 10 mg doses and goes up from there to 70 mg or 80 mg, if I recall. I went up to 60 mg before switching to Vyvanse. Vyvanse is the same drug as Adderall ((dextroamphetamine)), except it’s bonded to an amino acid which causes it to be long-acting. I find this type more effective, as it prevents a huge crash once the drug wears off since it absorbs more slowly. I currently take 60 mg.

What DOES it do?

The Good:

• Improves memory related functions ((which is good as memory loss and issues is common for people with narcolepsy)).
  
• Increases wakefulness ((also critical for narcoleptic people)).
• Improves reaction time.
• Reduces fatigue.
• Increases self-confidence and sociability.

The Bad:

• Loss of appetite.
  
• Very high or very low blood pressure.
• Dry mouth ((not everyone experiences this but I do and it seems like a considerable number of people do)).
• Causes excessive talkativeness ((both myself and my friend who takes it experience this, where we know we’re talking too much but it is uncontrollable)).
• Tics ((repetitive movements)).
• Overall “jittery” feeling.

These aren’t all the effects, but it’s a general picture of what to potentially expect.

What it DOESN’T do:

• It doesn’t make you smarter or learn faster; it helps you concentrate, not become more skilled in academics.
  
• They are dangerous for people who take them that don’t need them. If you take stimulant drugs without have a medical condition to warrant it, it can and will fuck up how your brain communicates with itself. Once the effectiveness wears off, you are prone to mood swings, loss of sleep, increased blood pressure fainting… the list goes on, but taking Adderall without needing can potentially cause a heart attack or stroke.
• It does not act like caffeine does. Some people think this, and it is not at all like caffeine in how it works.
• Just because doctors prescribe it doesn’t mean it’s totally safe. Adderall is a Schedule II drug, which I will explain. Normally, I go to the pharmacy and my doctor has digitally sent in the prescription with refills. Because Adderall is a highly controlled substance, I need to get a paper prescription, and it can only be for a 30-day supply and there are no refills on it so I need to go back and get a paper prescription every time. It’s not safe for people who don’t need it, but people do anyways so it has to be very controlled.
• It doesn’t make you super-mega-hyper. It typically just keeps you awake and helps your concentration, which can actually make you more quiet and still than usual. Some people ((myself include)) experience a jittery feeling and have motor tics, though they’re minor and don’t interfere with my functioning too much.

So now you know the truth about Adderall. I’d appreciate if people spread this to help drown out misinformation. I can only hope this helps people get educated, as it’s a wonderful medicine for people who need it.

rawboney:

spicyautism:

pissyjorts:

ithotyouknew2:

feelingpussy:

beijinhos:

spacemomayahalloway:

beijinhos:

how do yall just… drink soda every day??? how do you do that?? like… that doesnt hurt?

for some of us, it’s a way of self medicating certain diseases- ADHD for example.

it is NOT at ALL that deep

screaming

some people??? use soda???? to cope???????????

ik this is Funny Post and all and no one asked but caffeine actually does help ppl with ADHD focus which is what they meant

yeah…caffeine is a stimulant and prescription stimulants are often used to treat symptoms of ADHD

it’s not “coping;” it’s regularly consuming something that decreases unwanted symptoms (AKA self medicating)

and the most recent surveys show that ~11% of children have an ADHD diagnosis (that’s a significant portion)

plus there aren’t typically as many unwanted side effects produced by caffeine as compared to prescription stimulants (shaking, sweating, heart palpitations, loss of appetite, nausea, increased blood pressure/heart rate/body temp, hallucinations, irritability and violence, etc.)

i mean…stimulants were first marketed as weight loss drugs because loss of appetite is such a problem

plus soda is a lot fucking cheaper for most people than prescription stimulants (which also require an appointment with the doctor prescribing them every 3 months maximum because prescription stimulants are a controlled substance)

long lasting (in this case, a full day) stimulants like concerta can cost over $100 for a 1 month supply (what i was charged–and yes, i have insurance)

cheaper options like adderall (which i’ve still had to pay ~$45 out of pocket for a 1 month supply for) only last a few hours and need to be taken more than once a day (which is actually really damn difficult to do on a daily basis–esp when ADHD symptoms are also a factor)

so honestly OP and commenters/rebloggers who’re mocking/laughing at the comment that soda is used to self medicate in some cases should shut the hell up because it’s true

Ya’ll felt some type of way when somebody mentioned disability, so you gotta make a joke out of it. Typical. ya’ll need to come off that mocking disabled folks shit. It’s not cute.

I’m going to go ahead and chime in because even though I have prescription stimulants, I still use caffeine as a form of self-medication to try and fill in the gaps my prescriptions cannot cover. 

I have narcolepsy, and am insufferably tired 24/7, no matter how much sleep I get. The more tired I feel, the more likely I am to experience a sleep attack. I take Vyvanse ((essentially a long-acting Adderall)) to help keep me awake, but it can only do so much. Even at high doses I find that I still experience significant trouble managing my symptoms.

I also have chronic migraines. Caffeine is in many OTC painkillers aimed at headaches because caffeine actually helps alleviate migraines.

I have found that when using caffeine as a supplement, it dramatically increases my ability to function and cope with my symptoms. Granted, I no longer consume caffeine via soda- I’ve found it’s more effective to eat caffeinated chocolates but that’s irrelevant…

TL;DR Caffeine is effective in mitigating many symptoms of various illnesses, and due to it being readily available to most people in the western world it has become a valid way for people to self-medicate.

(Source: heartbeatemoji)

Choosing a Dog

howdoicollege:

Moving out opens up a million possibilities, but one thing a lot of people look forward to is getting their own pet. Dogs appear to be the most popular choice, and I can see why ((as I myself have a dog)). However, people fresh into adulthood often charge right into getting the pup they’ve always wanted, and problems crop up left and right. There’s a lot of factors that should go into choosing a dog, and there may be some you didn’t consider.

Breed, Size, Needs, Costs, Age, Etc.

A lot of people fancy large dogs, and try to make it work without consideration for their lifestyle or accommodations. Very few people live in a house for their first time moving out- most who live in places where dogs are allowed would be apartment complexes. When you’re new to adulthood and still figuring things out, the last thing you want is the expectations that come with a large breed, like a husky or a German shepherd. Think about it; big dogs require more effort than smaller breeds; while more robust, they have much higher demands in terms of exercise and space. As much as you may long for a greyhound or a Labrador retriever, if you live in a small space, it’s probably a bad idea to try and make that work. Frankly, it’s unfair to the dog to have to live in a home where they don’t have the proper room, or where their master may not be around enough or able to meet their physical needs.

As a side note, most apartment complexes that allow dogs have breed restrictions, which you need to go over before making any decisions. 

Size also plays a huge role, not only in the needs for space and exercise. Remember, you’re buying this dog’s food, and that can add up to much more than the owner expects. Fresh into adulthood, I’d be surprised if you were rolling in the dough. While larger dogs tend to be more robust and therefore able to eat most brands of food without much finickiness, they eat A LOT. On the other end of the spectrum, small dogs like Chihuahuas and Shih Tzus are far more delicate, and it’s important to invest in quality food to maintain their health. While they eat far less, you end up paying near the difference in quality. My dog is a Chihuahua-Terrier mix, clocking in at about 8 pounds. On average, she costs about $40/month to feed, not including treats/dental chews. I do buy her dental chews to keep her on the up and up, but I go through treats much slower, as I’m careful to keep her at a healthy weight. Treats/dental foodstuffs can vary greatly, but probably reach about $20/month on average. This, of course, is for a small dog. I buy decent quality food, but it lasts quite a while.

Of course, there are lots of other costs that happen preceding and following getting a dog. There’s a lot of money up front- for one, there’s the adoption fee ((I won’t go into it in this post, but adopting a dog is LEAGUES better than purchasing on from the pet store, not to mention incredibly cheaper)). Then, there’s an initial vet check-up, a bed, toys, leash, dishes, etc. Again, prices will fluctuate on materials based on the size of the dog ((beds especially jump up in price for big dog beds, as one would expect)). Before you commit to adopting a dog, I’d recommend having about $400 set aside. You may not spend it all, but it’s good to have the money just in case, so you’re not caught in an awkward situation.

Vet visits can vary greatly- the shelter I got me dog from had her already immunized with all but one important shot, so I only paid for one immunization at my first visit. Furthermore, a lot of vet offices will give you your initial check-up for free ((sans any tests/shots of course)). Ideally, a dog should be taken in twice a year, and there is always a possibility of health issues cropping up. However, if you invest in their everyday health, problems will crop up much less. Basically, in terms of health, give them appropriate food, ensure they have their vaccinations, and check them at the vet twice a year or so, unless the dog gets ill.

I’d like to mention one more thing about health- prepare for common illnesses. Specifically, fleas. Do NOT buy a cheap flea collar, though. They are known to severely damage the dog’s skin and irritate, often making them ill. There’s too many horror stories about pet owners getting a cheap flea collar to save money and reaping the consequences. Research your brands. Either have a flea collar on hand, or give your dog preventative medicine. Prices can vary, but do not skimp on this, as you’re dealing with chemicals to put in and on your dog.

Now, here’s something that a lot of people don’t think much about: Age. It’s pretty expected that people want to adopt puppies, but I honestly advise against this. Especially if you’re on the younger side or still getting used to adult life, you should NOT adopt a puppy. As a side note, they do cost more to adopt, anyways. My personal suggestion is to get a dog that is at least 2 years old, with 3-4 being ideal. There’s a bias against older dogs, when they’re actually a much wiser choice. My dog, Peaches, is estimated to be about 2 or 3 years old ((based on the vet’s appraisal when she was taken in at the shelter)). By this age, you know what their temperament will be. Rarely are there any surprises, and the dog is more than likely at its full size. There’s also a higher chance that they’ll be house-trained right away; this isn’t always the case, but I was pleasantly surprised to find that Peaches has almost no accidents and quickly caught on to how to let me know to take her outside. Older does not mean worse; if you take care of your dog, they can live quite long ((depending on the breed)). My best friend adopted a 10 year old dog, and he’s as loving and relaxed as can be, making him a lot easier for them to take of, since my friend is a busy person. Puppies require exponentially more time and training, which can be frustrating or unfeasible for students or full-time workers.

One other factor worth noting is the dog’s grooming requirements. Is the dog short or long hair? How long do they need to get a haircut or be groomed? How often do they need their nails trimmed? Peaches is short-hair and hasn’t needed grooming at all since I got her four months ago; she’s needed her nails trimmed three times, which costs about $10. I bathe her at home since she’s short-hair, small, and tolerant of baths. Overgrown fur can obstruct a dog’s vision, created matted tufts… it’s just not something you want. Long nails are also a no-go; you’ll need to get your dog’s nails trimmed slightly more often if they don’t walk on cement much, as there’s nothing naturally filing their nails. Long nails can be very uncomfortable for the dog, and cause accidental scratches on you when playing.

To recap, these are all the most important traits I would recommend considering before actually getting a dog: Breed, Size, Needs ((Food, Health, Exercise, Space, Grooming)), Costs ((Initial, Monthly, Vet)), and Age. It seems like a lot, but if you bear these in mind, you’ll have a far easier time and know what to expect with your new pet.

This specifically is targeted for people getting their first dog once moving out, but is easily applicable to anyone who is choosing a dog! I hope this helped, and if you have/get a dog, you should definitely submit a picture. 

A Letter to Nintendo (I Met My Love on Mario Kart)

iwillalwaysbeyourlink:

Dear Nintendo,



If you didn’t exist I would not have met the love of my life. You’re probably thinking, “So you bumped into someone and realised you both liked Nintendo, who doesn’t? Cool story…” Not even close. 

The year was 2008, a year I’m sure many hold dear in their hearts. The year Mario Kart Wii was released. I don’t know about yours, but my days were filled with holding that wheel (of the plastic kind). MKWii was basically the air I breathed, I still remember my very first online race as crisp as a freshly cut lawn (Grumble Volcano before people realised that glitch existed). After playing the other Mario Kart games over the years against item-lucky computers (and the rare actual person), this blew my mind. However this is barely relevant to the story. The point is, people. There were people out there, just like you and me, casually sitting on the couch with a wheel imprint (perhaps 3.5% of the racing population) left in our hands and soul. Many hours (days, weeks, months), races (thousands, easily), blood sweat and tears went into this game and we all got something out of it I’m sure; fun, frustration, and friends.

Living in that piece of country people may often forget even exists (if it weren’t for the fact we use kangaroos as transport, especially after we realised emus don’t fly nor reverse), the option to play continental was such a blessing as we would often bump into the same people and you’d have that unspoken connection. No words, no contact, you just recognised each other by your Mii and/or name (for those who didn’t change it from John to W4FFLEZ, to SwagMeister89 every day). There was this one player that just stuck out to me, perhaps it was her luscious brown pixilated hair. Or it could have been because we seemed to be completely evenly matched, the only thing that separated us were those items. She’d win one race, I’d win the next. We had formed some unspoken bond, completely without contact, as we wouldn’t hit each other with items but were happy to do so to others. Side by side we’d race until some item-happy player would come along and separate us. So I’d stop at the finish line for her, even if that meant getting last place, just to let her know I saw what happened and she doesn’t deserve to come last because of some item spammer (you know, usually the 3 red shells one at a time). This became a trend and went both ways, I’d see her waiting there at the finish line for me. Then we’d both stop, together, and neither of us would cross. We just sat there at the line, revving our engines, moving backwards and forwards, wanting the other to cross. I still remember so clearly at 1am in the morning we ended up in a race together with just one other person, so the 3 of us. The race started but, simultaneously, we turned around and went backwards, did loops around each other, did the stop start (like when cloud man picks you up and you need a boost) into each other’s vehicles, grabbed items just to hit each other with, not having a single care about the race itself. This lasted for a good while, many laughs were had, and it seemed a true bond was formed - without a single word to each other. At this point, Mario Kart Wii didn’t have the option to add a friend just by clicking on them, or contacting them for that matter. You had to actually converse with them to get their friend code to then become friends, so all this time we were ‘scouring the country side’ to find each other (or more so because Australia is about as big as a 250kb USB, it was easy to bump into each other). Race after race, hour after hour, day after day, week after week we would race.


I didn’t know who this girl was (or even if she was a girl on the other side, let’s be honest) but we were Mario Kart soul mates. It wasn’t just Mario Kart that I loved, it was racing her, through our unspoken bond and silly rituals, that was fun in the purest form. It sounds like a Mario Kart love story… Until that dreaded time came where eventually we went our separate ways. It was time to say that unspoken goodbye, time to let go of that unspoken bond, time to move on. That was it…



So that’s the story, I met the pixilated love of my life and we raced until we could race no more.



…Ah but that’s only the beginning.

 6 years later Mario Kart 8 was released and I wiped the dust off the wheel, reflecting on the past. That wheel was my partner in crime, Epona to Link. It had scratches, bits missing out of it, even bite marks (ahem, sometimes races don’t exactly go your ways…). Those were the times! I jumped online only to find I had people from France, UK and Italy roam my races. Where were my fellow Australians? I played a few races and that was it, holding too strongly onto the past. Down went my trusty wheel and off went the game.

Until one afternoon my brother was bored (or procrastinating) and wanted to know what Mario Kart 8 was like, as we didn’t spend that much time together it was a prime opportunity to chill. So I popped it on, jumped online and went through the motions. A few races with people so far away, whilst fun, I got bored too fast. Almost switching the console off, something stopped me. Those brown eyes, luscious brown hair, big smile, black outfit. Could it be? It was. It was her. In a packed race filled with people from France, UK and Italy there were two Australians. Myself and the girl I raced almost 7 years ago. The girl who stopped at the line for me, the girl who didn’t hit me with items, the girl who who was my racing equal, the girl who I never spoke a word with but shared an unspoken bond. She had the same Mii, same name, there was no doubt it was her. Unlike me I had a different Mii (puberty does things to you) and a different name (I felt now that I was 23 I could level up from nickname to actual name). I knew who she was but she would never know who I am! I was on the tracks riding next to her, beeping at her, bumping into her, all the while knowing she would just think I’m some weirdo who doesn’t know how to handle a bike. It was all so ironic, as well as the fact unlike MK Wii we both didn’t race as our Miis but as Mario and Peach (the helmets covered up our luscious brown hair, y’see). Mario chasing his princess whilst the princess was basically in another castle/didn’t know who he was. I wanted to reach out and tell her who I was; I was that guy she raced almost 7 years ago, that guy who stopped at the line for her, protected her from items, the guy who she stayed up with into the early hours of the morning, that guy she never spoke a single word to. I savoured every race not knowing if I’d ever be able to see her again. I raced by her side race after race, even though I was hit with her items (“And if you hurt me, that’s okay baby” - Ed Sheeran, ‘Photograph’), I even stopped at the line for her. Did she know who I was? Probably not. Next race she was gone. 



And that is how I met the love of my life on Mario Kart, twice. Does that count as a real love story? We basically raced into the sunset to live happily ever after, right?



So there may be more to it. Being in a state of excitement, nostalgia, and who knows what, I was a man on a mission. When I’m a man on a mission I usually forget the simple things, like clicking on her Mii to add her as a friend. I didn’t even know such a thing existed. So I literally was a man on a mission. My first resort, google. Obviously no luck. Miiverse! Excitedly I reached ‘Search Users’ and typed in her name, only to realise that it was one of the most common names to exist. After about an hour of searching my hope was wearing thin, my face resembled a Mii who came in at least 10th, head down, lost, reflecting, pondering. Hang on, she had stars in her name! Apparently everyone with the name Lisa has stars in them. No luck. Utterly defeated, I held the power button down for two seconds and just before the third I realised something. Something didn’t look right… That’s right, she had spaces between the stars! I’ve never been more determined to hit that space bar. There she was. I had found her.

“Hey Lisa! I’m not sure if you’d remember me but I used to race as Ed back in the MKWii days! Was good to see you, can see you haven’t lost your touch!” Not even sure if she’d see the message or even reply, it was all in the hands of fate now. Fate it certainly was. She remembered me. We conversed through Miiverse, learning little basic bits about each other. The most important being that The Legend of Zelda was our favourite gaming series (and basically favourite thing to exist). To the point I have a Zelda tattoo and her dog’s name is Link. Destiny? From there, she asked for my email address so she could send me a photo of Link (let’s just say I am very thankful for Miiverse’s lack of characters/ability to send photos). 


One message turned into many, across days, weeks and months. A one sentence message grew into paragraphs, pages, novels, photos and videos. One single message evolved into over 25 000 words combined. Who knew what one message could lead to. I had found someone who I connected with on every level, whom I shared endless things in common with, big to small (to the point of both of us being left-handed and our birthdays being 2 days apart). However she lived a whole state away. This was nothing but a mere friendship over the internet.



I came across the amazing fan book “Legend of the Hero” by Kari Fry and bought one, along with a few other Zelda bits and pieces. A thought crossed my mind, perhaps I could send this to her? I mean it’s just as easy for her to go buy it herself, but it would be nice, right? So she ended up giving me her address and I excitedly made her a Zelda package. 


Off it went, along with my number on the back of the package (as required by the, ultimate wingman, post office). I soon received a very excited text message and from there we conversed through text - although we couldn’t let go of our novel emails straight away, as our recent messages were “Hey, just letting you know the Postman has left something in your inbox (Da na na naaaa)!” Soon after she sent me my very own Zelda package, which was easily the best package I have ever received in my life.








From there I knew I wanted to meet her. I wanted to drop everything, catch a plane, and meet this girl who I shared this abnormally special connection with. Meet this girl who I had raced for many hours, days, weeks and months on Mario Kart(s) (“Oh I lost you once but I found you twice, and my search is over” - ‘Deeper Love’, Mike Mago). Meet this girl who I waited for; not only at the line but, unknowingly, for many years. Meet this girl who I had spent hours upon hours writing to, words upon words, photos upon photos. Meet this girl who seemed to be a destined part of my life. That I did. 



One single flight and a solid friendship turned into thirteen flights (within a month) and a beautiful relationship, with the final flight being a permanent one. I’ve now moved states, transferred jobs, and am living with my best friend, my soulmate, my love. Best decision I’ve ever made was to catch that flight. No, the best decision I’ve ever made was to play Mario Kart. 











Who knew that Mario Kart could forever change your life?



Thank you, Nintendo.



- Elijah 



P.S. We are now very happily engaged - Zelda rings* for the both of us!


*Austin Moore from Earth Art Gem and Jewelry (https://www.etsy.com/shop/mooredesign13) made both our rings, with Lisa’s being a custom made design. Absolutely recommend!


P.P.S. Here is a link to the video (also included within post) of me proposing to my now fiancee (with Mario Kart included - as well as a Zelda cake): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ukkw6XI4jTo 

Thank you, Nintendo.

Some Odds and Ends About my Life

This is literally the first time in a week I’ve been able to really sit down and be on Tumblr so I’m posting a LOT that’s actually not part of the queue! XD I’ve been talking a lot about this and that, but I figured I’d make a few little announcements for those who were curious just to make a few notes about my life.

-I went to the psychiatrist last week. Although I still experience frequent anxiety attacks, it’s been over a year since I’ve had a panic attack so that is considered resolved.

-However, I explained what has been on my mind to him and described the symptoms I’ve had since as early as 10 years old and he confirmed I likely do have Borderline Personality Disorder, so that effectively replaced Panic Disorder on my medical chart for the time being.

-I was in the ER on Monday night, which I briefly posted about. I was having an allergic reacting to an anti-psychotic medication I’d started and was directed to increase my dosage too quickly on. I’ve since gone down to a lower dose and stayed on that since that seems to be tolerated.

-I also contracted an unidentified form of skin rash/lesion. I saw a dermatologist who said it wasn’t from the allergic reaction, she couldn’t figure out what it was, and it concerned her greatly. She took a culture, prescribed me some of the strongest antibiotic and steroid ointments she could, and told me to come back Friday- if it weren’t better by tomorrow she would biopsy it. However, it’s begun to recede over the past day! I’ve been very liberally applying the ointments over those damn lesions, and thankfully it seems to be working. I did not need that on top of my usual routine of health problems.

-And, of course, that caused me to get behind on my homework on the very first week, which probably looked bad to all my teachers. I met with all of them before the first day of class to let them know about my gender and my medical issues so they all were fairly understanding, but I still felt bad. My calculus teacher and chemistry teacher gave me extensions, but I stayed up unitl 2am last night, only going over the normal Calculus deadline by 2 hours and still making the Chemistry deadline. I didn’t even know about my elective ((Words, Voice, Movement)) having an assignment so I told her this and she graciously said she’d give me until the end of the week- I’ll do that tomorrow. I want to show them I’m not trying to take advantage of my illnesses, and that I want as little special treatment as possible while still being reasonably mindful of my disabilities.

-I love living in my own apartment! It’s still clean, and I think I’ll make a video tour today to get me off the couch and out of this slump.

-I got a pet plant since I can’t have pets other than fish ((and I hate cleaning tanks, tbh)). He’s a Kalanchoe plant and I’ve named in Napoleon. =v= He’s sweet and spunky, and very diligent with a keen eye for detail. He watched over every nook and cranny of the house while I’m gone, and he likes to watch Netflix and YouTube with me while I’m home.

That’s the main stuff? I need to get up and make an apartment tour!

Cultures are NOT Costumes

hideinsideout:

scruffyynerffherderr:

17mul:

katblaque:

This is a transcript of this video

(This video is fully closed captioned!)

So, i was planning on doing this video a lot later on in the month, but I realized that a lot of people are probably planning their Halloween costumes right now and I just wanted to stop you now before you made a fool out of yourself.

So, every year around this time we always seem to have a rash of people who want to feel a little ethnic for the evening and think Halloween is the perfect time for that.

You can be a Spicy Senorita

A China Man

An Indian Princess

Or a brave African Warrior!

Or… you could not be an insensitive jerk and recognize that cultures are NOT costumes

Look, I get the point of Halloween is to dress up as something you’re not and role play all night. I get it, I do.

but when your costume is parodying or poking fun at a culture that is not your own, I’m sorry but you’re kind of a jerk and you’re certainly not invited to my Halloween party.

Now, I’m the sort of person that likes to assume the best of people, I don’t want to assume that people who wear these costumes are racists. I’d like to just assume that you don’t know any better so let me go down a list of problematic costumes and tell you why they are:

While dressing as a sensitive geisha for the night, might be fun for you,

Asian women have to live with the geisha stereotype that says that they are quiet, submissive and subservient.

While wearing an Indian headdress may make your Native American themed costume more extravagant,

you’re ignoring the fact that the Native American Headdress  is a sign of achievement that is cherished in many native communities.

Wearing it as a joke or as part of a costume is hella disrespectful.

Dressing up as an “Arabian” Terrorist may be a hit with all of your racist friends,

but people of middle eastern descent have to live with people assuming that they’re terrorists because of their race and how they may choose to practice their religions

One of the main reasons I’m making this video is because of the response to my black face video.

A lot of people were asking me if it was ok for them to darken their skin when playing a black character, or a character with darker complexion.

Now, first and foremost I wanted to say this:

I have no idea WHY when you look at a black character the biggest thing you take away is their skin color. I’m sorry, but if you can’t convincingly dress like a black character without darkening your skin tone, your costume is really bad and you should probably just not do it all together.

To be completely honest, I feel like there are some people that are just dying to paint their skin black and act like a black stereotype. I always hear this argument about how darkening their skin somehow makes their portrayal more accurate and I think that’s a massive excuse.

Black face has a long history of pain and hurt behind it, as do these other stereotypes we’ve discussed here.

I was Velma last year for Halloween. Everyone knew who I was. No one  was confused because my look and my outfit were on point. So NO you shouldn’t be darkening your skin tone to play a character that’s black.

Lightening my skin never once came to my mind, even though the character is white. Because Velma is so much more than a nerdy white girl.

When the biggest thing you take away from a character is their race, that’s probably a costume you should veer away from.

You wear the COSTUME, not the race.

Look at these great cosplayers. You know exactly who they are even though they aren’t the original race of the character.

 

These costumes are amazing and clearly tell you who they’re supposed to be.

Look at problematic as hell, Miley Cyrus doing it right with her lil kim Haloween costume. When Miley Cyrus is being less racist than you then it’s time to look at your life and look at your decisions.

Look at Ellen who FLAWLESSLY dressed as Nicki Minaj one year.

Look at this adorable Tiana Frog Princess cosplay

One of my favorite Marvel Characters is Storm and this girl did a bang on job

You know who these characters are and you don’t need black face to communicate that.

A lot of Halloween costumes are manifestations of harmful racial stereotypes. Stereotypes that I’m sure lack a lot of context at this point in society, but are still just as offensive to the people of color who have to deal with these stereotypes in their day to day lives.

If your costume says “tribe” or “ethnic” or “traditional” or “authentic” on it, then the chances are you’re grabbing a problematic costume. And again if you wear it, you’re not invited to my party.

If you’d be embarrassed to be seen by a person of the race that you’re parodying then that’s a costume you probably shouldn’t wear.

At the end of the day, Halloween is supposed to be about FUN. There are so many costumes that you can wear that aren’t racist that do not require you to try on the culture of another person’s culture for an evening.

If you’re having fun at someone’s expense, then you’re sort of a jerk and you should examine why you feel entitled to wear a costume that you know is offensive to people of the race you’re parodying.

Like I said, I prefer to air on the side of people just not knowing better. So I hope this video stopped you from buying that racist Halloween costume.

And on that note PLEASE share this video to all of your problematic friends. I really don’t want to see a slew of articles and posts about NEW racist costumes. It’s 2014 and we should really be over this by now.

So ghouls and girls, be sure to have fun this Halloween and always remember and never forget that you are beautiful and you are loved… bye!! <3


Resources:

http://colorlines.com/archives/2011/10/in_the_immortal_words_of.html

http://thestripesblog.com/2014/02/12/the-misrepresented-and-hypersexualized-latina/

http://apihtawikosisan.com/hall-of-shame/an-open-letter-to-non-natives-in-headdresses/

http://cosplayingwhileblack.tumblr.com

afroblossom

Halloween is coming up guys. Time to find a costume that doesn’t make you look like a racist prick.

To add on:

For Motor City Comic Con last year, I went as Snow White. Can I tell you how many precious little angel faces came up to me asking their parents and me if they could get a picture with me!?!?! 3-6 year olds!

THEY DIDN’T SEE RACE! THEY SAW A COSTUME! AND THE COSTUME IS ALL THAT MATTERED TO THEM!

All they saw was Snow White. Can we not teach these young impressionable minds that they have to change how they look to fit a costume, or that it’s cool to do so, or even teaching them that they have to be a certain race/size to be a particular character? It’s not!

Moemon FireRed: Part 4 “My Least Favorite Kind Of Grinding”

Well, we lost JOHN CENA and BIRB last time, so we have to roll with the remaining two, FRIDAY the Tailow and CARAMELL the Azurill. I spent a good amount of time whipping these suckers into shape- they’re my only two other Pokemon, so if they fuck up then it’s game over for GRUMP. 

FRIDAY was easy enough to train, but as it turns out, CARAMELL is more annoying than the damn song they got their name from.

Do you see this shit? CARAMELL was eleven levels higher, and used a super effective move. It STILL couldn’t knock out a fucking Diglett. This thing is weaker than a white person’s taste buds. I’m terrified to send it into battle because it’ll get bitch slapped into oblivion the second it steps out.

In other news, during the many trips to the Pokemon center I made, I talked to some of the visitors. This asshole was such a dick about it I wanted to crane kick that phone right out of his clammy hands. Seriously, a simple “excuse me, I’m on the phone” would have sufficed, but he had to be an absolute prick about it.

Well at least you’re friendlier than the prickly phone guy, I guess.

Oh, shove off. I’ve changed my mind about you.

Dear Lord, no. I don’t want to give you any information that could let you find me again. I’m donion rings with these commoners. Back to level grinding.

After the hell of CARAMELL, I want to strangle the damn thing with his own tail. Whatever,let’s just take on Dwayne “The Brock” Johnson again.

Yeah, CARAMELL is frail as paper, but it turns out this Duskull doesn’t know any attacking moves except ghost type ones. So CARAMELL should be able to do this since it can’t get hurt. I mean, he did, but at what cost? It took about twenty turns because Duskull had Disable and would shut off my only attacking move, Bubble, every few turns. This is bullshit. I don’t know who makes me angrier, Duskull or CARAMELL.

FRIDAY took out the sinister Nidorina with no problem whatsoever. Unlike someone else on the team, she’s competent and carried the rest of the team through the battle like a bro.

Cool beans; I got the TM for Rock Tomb. That’s pretty neat. On to the next route! I need more Pokemon to fill out my team.

Now I can run? Why couldn’t I run before? Was I wearing high heels? Wooden clogs? I can only assume that is the case, in which case why didn’t I take off my shoes? I know wooden clogs are all the rage in Kanto, but at what cost?

After fighting some scrublords, it’s time to find my Route 3 catch. I’m having CARAMELL deal with it since FRIDAY is too strong.

HOLY SHIT! Now this is what I’m talking about- I want him. He’s mine. DON’T FUCK THIS UP, CARAMELL.

Once in the red zone, I switched to FRIDAY so she could take a few hits while I chucked balls. After just one ball, Bagon was caught. Now’s the fun part- naming. I think I’ll keep the name a secret until the next part. Becuase why the hell not?

I’m back in Pewter City, because it’s time for me to do some more grinding, and not even the fun kind. Bagon needs to get up to speed, and once he’s ready to hold is own, I’ll reveal his name and towards Mt. Moon.

Let’s hope I don’t throw CARAMELL off Mt. Moon by the end of the dungeon.