So my mom is withholding my “allowance” (the money I use to exist). They (her and dad) made me move back in with them which is 20 minutes away from ANYTHING at best so a job is off the table. She refuses to use my correct name and pronouns, and when she does attempt it she treats it like a game or a burden, even though she knows that it pushed me towards three out of four of my suicide attempts. I feel isolated and in the middle of nowhere. I can’t save up to live with my girlfriend again because, again, a job is impossible right now. I’m disabled physically and mentally (I will soon be admitted to a facility for a month so that’s another reason I can’t yet apply for any jobs), stuck in a place where I can’t do anything, and my mental health is further deteriorating at an alarming rate by having to stay there.

What the hell do I do? What I need to do is earn some money but that’s damn near impossible. I’m so stressed and sick of living there, in a house where I’m not respected and my identity is treated like a joke.

I am a ball of distilled stress right now.

Hello migraine.

People who think those with mental disorders are “faking it” or milking it for the attention are the worst kind of people.

A lot of my friends suffer from mental illness, myself included. Today at robotics one of my friends passed out because of her extreme migraines and stress (an experience I’m all too familiar with). Of course one guy decides to be an asshat (a guy who wasn’t even robotics but was just loitering around in the room) and says “look she’s still breathing she’s clearly not passed out. I bet she’s faking.”.

Where do I even begins with all the things wrong with that?

Fun Fact: My migraines are getting worse lately, and I’m not allowed to take painkillers for them.

I’m starting to get really paranoid because it’s only a matter of time before I have an anxiety attack from my migraines. I haven’t had one at school since May, and I’m hoping to keep it that way.

Stressing over this isn’t helping my anxiety, though.

Help.